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The Bones of Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

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Welcome back to the Good Bones of the Skywalker Star Wars Saga!

This week we’re diving head first into Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

If you missed the first two installments of Good Bones, you can find the first one HERE.

And now, for the last of the prequels:

Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

I’ve only seen this movie once before…in the theater. It didn’t capture me then, and this time around the only reason I liked it better is because last year we watched the animated Clone Wars Series.

The Clone Wars Series sets up SO MUCH of this movie. I kind of loved it. However, I’m not going to include this series in my assessment of the movies. Movies only.

 

The Bones:

The Jedi Order Must Fall

Palpatine Becomes Emperor and the Empire Emerges

Anakin Completes His Fall to the Dark Side and Becomes Darth Vader

Obi Wan Saves Anakin’s Family

The Jedi Order Must Fall

This movie tried to tell/show us that Palpatine has been working on Anakin for a while. In the opening sequence Anakin and Obi Wan are in the middle of a huge space battle and out to rescue Chancellor Palpatine from Count Dooku.

They do so. Obi Wan gets knocked out and Anakin—after Palpatine’s urging—kills Dooku.

This scene…isn’t all bad. It does show that Anakin is more powerful than Obi Wan. It also shows us that Palpatine’s influence over Anakin is stronger than his Jedi training.

I’m not sure if it’s the acting or the writing that makes the whole thing seem disjointed and lame, but there you go. The bones were there.

We soon find out that Anakin is having dreams about Padmé in pain and dying—reminiscent of his mother. Anakin’s distress gets worse when he finds out she’s pregnant.

Does he go to Obi Wan or even Yoda about this? No. He goes to Palpatine.

The reason for this is apparent when Palpatine asks that Anakin become his special advisor on the Jedi council. The council decides (grudgingly) that Anakin can be on the council, but they don’t make him a Jedi Master.

Anakin is all bent out of shape about this and pouts just like he did in the last episode. Then Obi Wan asks Anakin, on the council’s behalf, if he’ll spy on Palpatine for them.

How. Dumb. Are. The. Jedi?

They know Anakin. They know he has a personal relationship with Palpatine. So yes, it makes sense that he could get information through him, but seriously? You know he’s going to be upset about it. Why not just talk to him like a normal human being when you need to know something? Ask Anakin his opinion and then what the Chancellor is thinking. You’ll attract more flies with honey than vinegar, dummies.

Yoda is 800 years old. He should know better.

Obi Wan is supposedly like a brother to Anakin. He should know better.

Once this crack has appeared, things go downhill. Yes, after Palpatine reveals himself as a Sith, Anakin goes to the council to tattle, but it’s too late. Palpatine already has his claws into Anakin, and when he has to choose between Mace Windu and Palpatine, he chooses the man who has shown him kindness and respect.

Duh.

Palpatine Becomes Emperor and the Empire Emerges

Most of this in the movie works. It is, unfortunately, built on the stupidity of the Jedi, but whatever, bring forth the Empire!

Yoda and Palpatine’s fight is epic. I like that Yoda looses, even after we’ve seen how powerful he is. Good job there.

Having the clones turn against the Jedi is brilliant. Talk about heartbreaking!

Palpatine has been setting pieces in place for this since before Episode I, and it pays off here. Frankly, I’d love to see a vignette of Palpatine’s manipulations. The conversations, the promises made, messing with the Jedi so the force was out of balance. That would be cool.

I mentioned in my review of Episode I that the whole bringing balance to the force thing never actually happens. We still don’t know what that should look like and why it’s out of balance now. It’s probably Palpatine’s fault, but they never show us. This is a huge ball dropped.

Anakin Completes His Fall to the Dark Side and Becomes Darth Vader

This is really what the movie is about, and bits and pieces of it are sprinkled throughout.

The dreams about Padmé are genius. This is his fear and Palpatine plays him like a fiddle.

If you just take the instances in the film where Palpatine breaks Anakin down, it’s not bad. It’s great that he loses control and hurts Padmé. Especially since he turned to the dark side for her. (Remember I said this is the most important relationship in the films?) So he could save her. The execution in the film is a little clumsy, but the bones are totally there.

My biggest beef with Anakin’s fall is at the Jedi Temple.

If he’s so powerful, I want to see him wading through Jedi to get the clones in. Kill a few people we care about. Heck, have the librarian lady be bad a** and give him a run for his money, until he gets irritated and basically squishes her like a bug.

Now for the moment in the film that actually jumped the shark for me.

Killing the Jedi children.

Show them begging. Show them pleading. Show them running toward Anakin in hopes of being saved, then have him turn the clones loose on them with a lazy wave of his hand. He’s too good to be bothered with killing weaklings like them. Show me that he doesn’t care. Give him space to fall farther when he hurts Padmé and fights with Obi Wan.

Obi Wan hides aboard Padmé’s ship when she goes to Anakin on Mustafar. Anakin thinks she betrayed him and he strangles her. This works.

I do like a meme I saw that said a woman who is eight months pregnant wouldn’t be prancing around asking Anakin what was wrong, she’d be like, “What the h*** Anakin? What are you doing??”

Then the fight…

The dueling is awesome. The hubby thinks it’s a bit long, but I disagree. The reason it feels long, is because it’s about the spectacle (cough-Lucas) and not the dark side and the light side. Or the bond of friendship that is supposed to be between these too. No, instead we get a lot of fancy special effects while Anakin tries to chop Obi Wan in half.

When Obi Wan tells Anakin the they were brothers…that he was supposed to be the chosen one…it falls flat. I mean, Ewan McGegor delivers the lines like a pro, but without some build up before that, it isn’t as powerful as it could be.

In my opinion, they should have been talking the entire fight. Obi Wan hardly ever stops talking before this, and he would be trying to slap some sense into Anakin. Every blow should have been a frustration between them, or something Obi Wan thought was awesome but Anakin counters with how he’s been treated and feeling for the past 15 years or whatever. Build up to those last moments and show us why Obi Wan can’t bring himself to kill Anakin. His friend. His brother.

There should have been tears!!!! And instead most of us were just waiting to watch Anakin burn. Which was, I must say, most impressive.

The more I thought about this movie, the better the bones felt to me. Execution was, in true Lucas style, too focused on the spectacle.

Obi Wan Saves Anakin’s Family…well the kids anyway

Okay, Obi Wan and Yoda save the kids. Ish. This had to happen for Episode 4 to happen. So there you go.

Let’s talk about Padmé for a second.

Padmé’s character was totally different than in the other two films. She needed more of a back bone. Strong women like that don’t just roll over when a strong man comes into their life. Especially if they’re hormonal. She probably could have taken the entire senate in a meeting by herself, but no, she sat back and watched.

Also the girl who fought her way back into her palace in episode I and then out of the pit of monsters in episode II is not going to die of a broken heart. Not unless we have a lot more context to work with. Even in the Clone Wars Series (yes, I’m bringing it up) there is plenty of tension between her and Anakin. Without showing us their passion, which doesn’t have to be sexual—this is a Star Wars movie—I can’t fathom giving up on life when you’ve just had two children.

Yes, I know she had to die while Leia was young (ugh on this too), but this could have been executed better.

Other tidbits

General Grievous…ugh…I know they needed someone for Obi Wan to beat up, but seriously? He’s better if you’ve seen the Clone Wars, where they gave the two of them quite a bit of history, but it didn’t work in this film. They should have introduced him in Episode II.

I do have to say that the last two minutes of Rogue One, where Darth Vader is after the stolen plans to the death star, makes him 100% cooler than he was in all three of the prequels combined. Why does it work so well? Because they SHOW us what he can do. They SHOW us how terrified everyone is of him, and then they follow up by having him easily wade through a bunch of fighters to get what he wants. Everyone in the theater cheered during that scene.

That’s what good storytelling can do.

 

Do you have any thoughts? Leave a comment below!


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The Bones of Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones

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Welcome to week two of the Good Bones of the Skywalker Star Wars Saga!

Last week, we talked about Episode 1: The Phantom Menace. Check it out HERE if you missed it.

Quick Recap

The Bones (or basic goals) of Episode I were the following:

Introduce the Jedi Order

Introduce Anakin aka the chosen one

Introduce Senator Palpatine and the galactic republic

Introduce the Sith

With the above accomplished (albeit badly for some) we move on to…

Episide II: Attack of the Clones

This movie was, as Episode I, both better and worse than I remembered.

As we watched it, I started searching for the bones of the story. When I finally got down to them, I almost felt bad for being so judgy about this movie. Lucas didn’t give his writers an easy job. Check this out.

The Bones:

Reintroduce all of the characters ten years later

Get Palpatine one step closer to being a dictator

Cause unrest and confusion in the Jedi Order

Discover the clone army

Anakin:

He’s super powerful!

But also super dumb.

He takes his first step toward the dark side

The love story

First off, that’s a lot of bones to fit into one story! That’s the reason I kind of feel bad for the writers. Getting all of that into one, coherent, less-than-six-hour-movie would be challenging.

Reintroduce all of the characters ten years later:

Was anyone surprised that Padmé  was in the fighter and not the Senator’s ship? Nope. So she hasn’t changed. This opening works okay for her.

Obi-Wan

Every moment Obi Wan is with Anakin he’s berating him. Like a mean older brother who thinks he knows everything. It’s hardly endearing. And I like Obi Wan. Now, the writers did use this as a starting point for his character arc (yes, it’s there…barely), so kudos for them there.

Anakin

Ten years later and he still sounds like a bratty kid trying to impress every one. Oh, that means he hasn’t changed either. Which doesn’t work.

Palpatine

Still playing the wise-old sage and ultimate nice guy. He makes my skin crawl. Good job here.

The Jedi

Ten years after being told there was a Sith Lord and they’re still shrugging the information off? Uh, I though these guys were the smart ones.

Get Palpatine One Step Closer to Becoming a Dictator

As I said, he seems so nice…but he’s playing both sides. Most of us, having seen these movies after the original trilogy, know what the outcome will be, and that makes it even worse! This is an often used writing tool—let the audience understand more than the characters. It stressed the audience out as the characters try to catch up. This is also pretty well done.

Cause Unrest and Confusion in the Jedi Order

Sith Lords, missing planets, a clone army they ordered but have no record of. If there’s one thing this movie does well is shed light on how the Jedi are not the powerhouse we were led to believe.

Discover the Clone Army

Obi Wan is front and center here, and he actually handles it pretty well. Get him away from Anakin and he’s an intelligent man. He’s hunting for the assassin that tried to kill Padmé , and ends up finding the clone army. I bet he never saw that coming. Wait, he’s a Jedi…nevermind.

I do like that this search takes us deeper into the bowels of Coruscant, and then to a distant land.  This felt okay.

Anakin

This is where Episode II falls to pieces.

Again, the writers had a lot of things to cover.

He’s super powerful!

But also super dumb.

He takes his first step toward the dark side…

He and Padmé  fall in love

These are the bones I’m going to pick at the most.

He’s so Powerful!

We’re told that Anakin is super-duper powerful. We hear this multiple times. Obi Wan is always cutting him down to size, and reminding him of his place. I’d probably be pretty ornery at this too.

Unfortunately, the story relies on Anakin chasing the assassin to show us how powerful he is. (A bit too late in the movie in my opinion, but we’ll get to that in a minute.) It comes off cocky. Sure, he’s got a lot of tricks up his sleeves, and doesn’t seem to have any fear, but in the end Obi Wan shows him up (after the writers make him look like a bit of a coward) using patience. This was supposed to be important, but again, comes off as some sort of rivalry that isn’t followed up on well.

He’s also Quite Dumb!

In order to get Anakin from little boy on Tatooine, to Darth Vader (Sorry, spoilers if you haven’t heard about that little ditty) the writers had to keep him a little immature. Or at least that’s what they chose to do with him. Can’t have a perfectly rational dude turning to the dark side, now can we?

Sure, most teenagers think they know everything, but after ten years in the Jedi order, I would imagine Anakin would have learned a thing or two about not being an idiot. That apparently hasn’t happened. They unfortunately use Obi Wan’s constant berating to make the Jedi Order look like they’re bullying Anakin. So we feel bad for him. This did not work for me. Maybe if they would have shown his anger and problems with authority in Episode I, this would have come off better.

Anakin has to take his first real step toward the dark side in this movie.

To be honest, this wasn’t bad. Using his mother’s pain and then death to send him over the edge was a brilliant plan. There were a few things that I thought could have been added or changed to improve this:

They should have added a few lines to another scene, where Anakin sincerely asks Obi Wan about his visions and if they can go and check on his mom. Show me the concerned son. Obi Wan would tell him they’d been over this and the Council won’t allow it. That would give a whole lot more credence to Anakin’s blaming Obi Wan later, and show how much Obi Wan is trying not to be like Qui Gon, which is actually against his character.

Anakin blames Obi Wan for everything, saying he’s jealous of Anakin’s powers. If this had been better shown earlier, this comment would really have cut to the bone. I think Obi Wan is jealous, but we have to really search for it.

When Anakin and Padmé  are in the garage and he freaks out after the attack on the village, the entire planet should have been shaking. Padmé  should have been terrified. Yes, at this point she would go to him, but there should be more uncertainty.

Anakin and Padmé  Fall in Love

Ugh. This is one of the worst love stories ever. It’s written and acted horribly, which I blame George Lucas for.

We’re delving into this one, because it is actually the most important relationship in the first six movies. *cracks knuckles*

I’ve really been harping on Showing and not Telling. It’s a writers thing, but it’s powerful.

For Padmé to fall in love with Anakin, she needs to see him as the man he’s become and not the boy she knew ten years ago, when she was barely in her mid-teens. I’m not going to play-by-play rewrite the whole movie, but this should have happened before Anakin and Obi Wan got assigned to protect her. Padmé should have seen Anakin doing some awesome and noble Jedi thing—preferably rescuing her in some way—and have been seriously impressed. Then she finds out it’s Anakin, and that gives us a foundation for her feelings. It also would have shown the audience just how crazy powerful he’d become.

Having him being such a puppy dog to her is…endearing? I found it annoying. If she would have shown interest first the entire love story would have flowed much better. Even just a flirting comment when they meet after she sees his heroism would have worked. Give the poor kid hope, instead of having him slobbering behind her for the first half of the movie, making us all feel awkward.

“I’m a Jedi. I’m super cool.”

“You’re so pretty.”

“I’m super cool. Look at my parlor tricks.”

This goes back to Episode I, but the age difference between them should have been closer. Or Anakin needed to be acting like the 20 year old he was, instead of a high school student. Relying on him simply being overwhelmed by “love” didn’t do this movie any favors.

I also don’t think the two of them actually agreed about very much. Relationships are built on common ground, and their discussions usually ended on a “we can agree to disagree” tone.

I found this as a summary of four crucial parts of a romance story:

  • A hero and a heroine to fall in love…Stop here. The fact that this wasn’t believable makes the other three points moot.
  • A problem that creates conflict and tension between them and threatens to keep them apart. Do they have anything that isn’t tension?
  • A developing love that is so special it comes about only once in a lifetime. Can I put air quotes around special?
  • A resolution in which the problem is solved and the couple is united. They resolve nothing. They go behind everyone’s back and begin living a lie.

So there you go. The love story needs some serious help. Actually, I think that simplifying it would have been better. In many cases, less is more. Show, don’t tell.

This love story did produce one of my favorite soundtrack songs in the prequels. Their song is so sad! It’s beautifully haunting. Love it.

The climax of the movie is okay. Loads of action, some humor from the droids, and a Yoda light saber fight that is pretty great. We get Obi Wan’s payoff as he tells Anakin that he can’t take Duooku alone, showing that he’s growing as a character.

Fun fact: I watched this movie for the second time, years ago, after I went to Dublin. I was totally flabbergasted that the Jedi Library looks just like the library at Trinity College! Trinity College was so amazing I might have cried. And I felt pretty awesome for having recognized their inspiration.

What are your thoughts on Episode II?


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The Bones of Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace

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Next month I’m moderating a Star Wars panel for a conference. The subject is all nine of the Skywalker saga films. The love. The hate. All of the emotions!

I haven’t seen episodes 1-3 in years. And I mean years. I only saw episode two twice and episode three once, so honestly, other than remembering that they weren’t great, I didn’t recall much. We started watching from the beginning last week. It’s all coming back to me now…

For the next nine weeks, I’m going to talk about the bones of each Star Wars movie, and how I would have told the story differently for better effect.

There’s no right or wrong answers, just my ramblings. I hope you enjoy them! Also, feel free to leave your thoughts on the matter in the comments.

The Bones:

(Things that needed to happen for the rest of the franchise to work)

Introduce the Jedi Order

Introduce Anakin aka the chosen one

Introduce the Sith

Introduce Senator Palpatine and the galactic republic

The Jedi Order:

If the Jedi are the bringers of peace and harmony in the galaxy, episode one doesn’t show us very much of that. Qui Gon plays hard and fast with people’s lives, not really listening to anyone, as he lies and cheats his way to getting them off of Tatooine. Don’t get me wrong, I like the guy, but his actions don’t really endear me to the Jedi. Nor does Obi Wan’s whining.

I would have loved it if the movie would have explained more about how the Jedi’s powers were out of balance. In truth, it’s never explained, and therefore maybe not even needed. It’s a great hook and conflict that sort of dribbles through the movies and never gets to shine.

Anakin: The Chosen one

I’ve always thought that Anakin was just a little too young in this movie. What is he supposed to be, like eight? Ten? He’s a dumb kid that supposedly has great powers. Problem is, they never show us the powers. He’s supposed to be the only human who can pod race, but they tell us that. We don’t see it. He has a high concentration of the force inside of him—go-go-Lucasisms—but again, we don’t see that. We have no idea what he’s capable of, and if this is the first Star Wars movie you’re watching, you really don’t know what the force is or why it’s out of balance. (Is it out of balance? Again, we’re only told that. Maybe the Jedi are full of it.)

I think it would have been better if Anakin had been in his early teens. Make him closer to Padme in age, making the romance in episode 2 less awkward. Also, show us this great and mysterious power that he has inside of him. Impress me. Show me his anger. Not a child’s tantrum. Scare me.

The Sith:

Bad guys. They do bad things in bad ways. I do like that they’re shown manipulating things from behind the scenes, but that’s all we know. Darth Sidious is really in charge of all of the idiots. Got it.

In truth, this aspect of the movie is pretty spot on.

Senator Palpatine:

Spoiler Alert, Palaptine is important. Episode one hints that there’s more to him than meets the eye, which is very true. This was one of the  things I did like about this movie. He seems so…nice. Which is a lie.

Things I liked:

I kind of liked the big party at the end, because it’s nostalgic to the end of episode 4

Duel of the Fates, and the music in general

The cracks in the republic’s foundation start here, and the way it crumbles is brilliant.

Things in this movie that are unnecessary:

(and when I say unnecessary I mean they could have either been seriously downsized or totally cut)

The Gungans

Padme running from one side of the galaxy to the other and back

Podracing

Most of the dialogue needs to be re-filmed. It’s a directing problem. ‘Nuf said.

***

The first twenty minutes of this movie is awful. Much worse than I remember. So many of the characters, and even species, are painfully  cliché. And of course, JarJar makes most fans want to weep and die. Or wish he would have been eaten by the sea monsters. Or blown up by droids.

In general I think about ¾ of this movie could have been left on the cutting room floor.

The bones were okay, but terribly fleshed out. As I said, show us the big, scary, cool things. Don’t just tell us about it. It’s hard to care without seeing and feeling more.


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To Trope or Not To Trope

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I’m at the end of writing the third book in my New Sight trilogy, which gives me the opportunity to look toward my next series. It will by YA Space Opera, and I’m super excited about it!

In an attempt to see what readers want, I pulled up the worst YA tropes ever. I read through a few lists and agreed with most of them. Then I pulled up the best YA tropes ever. I read through a few lists and…well…just read on.

YA Tropes We Love

  • The Chosen One – Only this character can save the world!
  • Love Triangles – Because ever girl secretly wishes she had two hot guys after her..
  • Surprise, you have superpowers! – How else are they supposed to save the world?
  • The world is so broken – Hello Dystopian society. Why fight bad guys when you can fight an entire bad system of government?
  • The “Strong” female character – Because girls kick butt!
  • The Super Evil Bad Guy – Because…evil
  • The dysfunctional family – Don’t we all love to watch someone else’s train wreck?
  • The tall, dark, handsome love interest – who also has a tragic past!

YA Tropes We Hate

  • The plain and super boring main character – who is destined to save the world
  • Love Triangles – They’re both so wonderful, however can I choose?
  • Your super plain protagonist has super secret super powers – this sounds familiar
  • The Coming of Age story – Because some people hate adventure? So they set their story in a dystopian world and all is well.
  • #StrongFemaleCharacter – A dude in a girl’s body
  • Evil Villains – who are evil just because it’s hip
  • Parents who are actually children in big bodies
  • The tall, dark, handsome love interest – who is a jerk

Do you see what happened there? Apparently readers hate the same things they love. I can’t tell you how confusing that is.

Needless to say, this little exercise didn’t really help me much. Thanks a lot, internet.

 


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